On an overcast afternoon in early March, a sombre David Croft saw the future of his rugby career spelled out right before his eyes.
It was a timely apparition. The Queensland Reds ultimate warrior was in the mood for reflection.
He had just been emotionally pulverised by the news he had been dropped from the Reds starting side to take on the defending Super 14 champion Bulls at Suncorp Stadium.
For most footballers, being benched is a simple occupational hazard. For 111-game flanker Croft, who fairly bleeds Queensland red, it was like being collected by a bus, then backed over for good measure.
"He was hurting pretty badly. It was probably the hardest thing I've ever done in a rugby career to drop him," said Reds forwards coach Mark Bell, who admits he was daunted at delivering the verdict.
Preferred to Croft was roughhouse rookie Tasi Luafutu, 20, who was given a surprise start to add a fresh vibe and sting to the Queensland pack. Even worse for Croft, the move worked. Luafutu's raw fire helped inspire the Reds to a memorable victory.
In response to his unwanted demotion, Croft went home and reconnected with the game he lives and breathes, writing down exactly what he loves about the sport that has been his livelihood for a decade.
At the end of his immersion in deep rugby thought, the verdict was deceptively simple - have more fun.
"It's never a good experience at all. Me getting dropped - I sat back and had a look at what's going on. I wrote down exactly what it was that I enjoyed about rugby," Croft said.
"I sat down and reflected and worked out I was at the stage that I was taking it all a bit too seriously and wasn't enjoying my rugby. Since then I've come back and I've really focused on the things I love about rugby. With that has come some better performances.
"You sometimes forget about the simple things, the reason you started rugby in the first place. Just the opportunity I had - it was if not a wake-up call, a very big challenge. I wasn't going to just lay down. I was very determined to get back in the side and fortunately I've had another opportunity."
Croft's hiatus lasted just one week, when he was elevated back into the 15 for the match against the Lions in Johannesburg. Since then, the 29-year-old has rediscovered the spring in his step, dusting off the proud mojo that was trampled in last season's wooden spoon debacle.
"What you don't want to do is become robotic. Maybe I was falling into a routine prior to that and was going through the motions. Sometimes you can forget the things that are dear to you, like putting on that jersey and running out in front of that crowd," Croft said.
Bell said Croft's short break was the key to reignite his legendary passion for the game.
"At one stage he was trying too hard and couldn't get into the game. He had a break and was out of the team and he wanted back in. He said to me about three times that week he wanted his spot back. He's probably the most passionate bloke I've ever coached," Bell said.
Croft will need to continue his form turnaround tonight when the Reds host the Western Force at Suncorp Stadium.
Despite improved results and a new drive under coach Phil Mooney, Queensland has just two wins to show from its eight outings this season.
As you would expect from a man who sets out his rugby goals in note form, Croft has done the maths. Despite remaining match-ups against five of the top six teams, the numbers say the Reds can still feature in the post-season.
"I never like conceding defeat. If there's a mathematical chance, I'll keep trying. And there is," Croft said.
"The best thing is we've got five of the best teams in the competition to play - four at home - and that's an exciting thing. We'll really know where we stand as a Reds team."



